Deep in the Heart

of the Shannon County jungle, our Intrepid Explorer is on the prowl. Suddenly, he raises his head. Is that the alarm chirp of the Greater Rednecked Boobie (Drinksalota budweiseris,) the Holy Grail of rare, Ozark birds? Silent as a church mouse in a cathouse, our Explorer inches ahead, fearful that he might misstep and have his quarry vanish into the mists. Onward he keeps moving, into the ruins of a long dead civilization. Finally, around one last corner, he locates the source of the chirp. It’s not a Boobie, but our Explorer is not to be disappointed. No, for it’s the only furry bird in the Ozarks, the Eastern Chipmunk.

Rare, small and flightless, the chipmunk is limited to the United States and southern Canada east of the Great Plains, except for Florida and parts of Georgia, the Carolinas and Virginia. Ah, our Intrepid Explorer will cherish this moment forever…

Yep, it’s true. I heard the chipmunk calling and thought it was the alarm cry of a bird. Spent 10 whole minutes tracking the sound around an old farmhouse only to find Theodore (my sister already has a chipmunk named Alvin, so I have to use Theodore) sitting on top of the steps. He let me come quite close, but kept the same pose until he decided that maybe I did want to eat him after all and made himself disappear into a crack at the back of the steps. Oh, by the way, chipmunks are not really birds nor rare, but they are furry, small and flightless. And fear not, there are Rednecked Boobies in Shannon County.

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